It has been a long time since my last post, but something happened today and I found myself saying "I have to write that down..."
This morning after the kids were dropped off at school, we received a phone call. Dave answered and I could immediately see his facial expression change. I could see the concern and bewilderment in his eyes as he said "Well that just doesn't sound right... I don't see how that's possible, we pick Jacob up after school... Here let me have you talk to my wife..." Dave's arm was extended towards me holding out the phone as he mouthed It's Mr. ________ the principal about Jacob.
My heart sunk as I said hello. The principal went on to explain that there have been some ongoing problems at school with Jacob, and although he was sure there were other kids involved, Jacob's name is the one that keeps coming up. There was a particular incident on Tuesday afternoon that resulted in student as well as another parent coming in to voice their concerns about Jacob calling others names/bad words, chasing other kids and shoving them. The principal wanted to set up a meeting early next week so that he could sit down with Dave, myself and Jacob's teacher to see what should be done. He mentioned hoping to find a way to motivate Jacob and make some changes. I agreed to a meeting Tuesday morning at 8:30 AM and hung up the phone dumfounded.
I looked at Dave and told him we were not waiting until next Tuesday to address this. I wanted to go and pull Jacob out of school and talk about this right away. Although Math and History are important things, an issue of character like this, my boy's heart, mattered far more than anything he would learn in class that day. Dave called back and spoke to the Principal again and explained that he wanted to address this with Jacob right away. The Principal offered to let Dave speak with Jacob over the phone saying that he was there in the office. Dave declined the offer saying that this was a conversation that needed to take place in person. He was coming to pick Jacob up and would be there in five minutes.
As I waited for their return, my mind was racing a million mile a minute. This didn't sound anything like my boy. He wasn't a mean kid, he doesn't use foul language, he doesn't push people around (well other than tickling his sister once in a while...). Jacob is the type of kid that gets along well with everyone, or at least that's what I always thought. I know that kids can act differently away from home... but this? How is it I could be so wrong about his heart?
As the car pulled into the driveway I looked out and watched Dave and Jacob get out of the car. Their expressions were not heavy. In fact they both appeared to be smiling. As they walked through the door Dave simply said "It wasn't him." I hugged by boy and cried. I was so happy to know not only that he wouldn't do something like that, but that I wasn't wrong about him... I do know my kid! Jacob reacted to my tears telling me that it made him want to cry too.
Turns out that when Dave went to the school office, Jacob wasn't there. The secretary, who knows our family, looked puzzled when Dave said that he was there to pick up Jacob after talking to the Principal. The secretary called down to Jacob's class and let him know he was going home. A few minutes later Jacob walked up the stairs smiling at Dave asking "what's up?". There was no guilt, fear or embarrassment one would expect to see from a child who had been called into the principal's office and had his parents called. Dave asked Jacob if he had been to the office that morning and was told "No, why?"
In reality, our Jacob has never been to the principals office. He had no idea what was going on. Dave smiled and told him it was his lucky day, and that he got to have a day off of school! He explained the course of events on the ride home.
Then we waited... Waited to see if/when the principal would figure out that a mistake had been made. Dave was willing to wait until next Tuesday and even attend the scheduled meeting if need be. Waiting was hard for me. I wanted to shout from the roof tops "You've got the wrong kid!" Dave was right, waiting was worth it though!
Around 10:40 the phone rang. It was the school. I answered saying "Hello" and immediately the apologies started. As we had figured, there was a mix up, and the Jacob who was in trouble was not our Jacob. The scene from Ferris Bueller's Day off kept plying in my mind. You know the one when he is talking to Sloan's "father"...
I must admit, I was smiling from ear to ear. I accepted the apology and just asked that he tell Jacob personally that he was sorry for the confusion. The principal mentioned that Jacob was the type of kid that should be called into the office to get an award, not because of trouble. He was more than happy to talk to him over the phone now and at school next week.
The relief and joy I feel this afternoon is priceless. I have been blessed with wonderful kids, and every once in a while it is a great thing to be reminded of how much I have to be thankful for. Here's Jacob... about as "bad" as he gets!
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